August 2010

States that I hate

August 31, 2010

I can tell where people read my blog…what countries, what states, what cities. I like to creep on you. So what? Here is a list of states that I hate because no one that is there has read Mom and Dem yet. Obviously these are places of great darkness and depression where laughter is swallowed [...]

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August: A Retrospective

August 31, 2010

For my readers who are special at using the computer, here is a line up of my funniest/most popular posts from the month of August. I looked up “2 month anniversary gift” in Google and this is what came up, in case anyone feels like they need to celebrate such an important Mom and Dem [...]

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The one where I let strangers into my house to buy my crap

August 30, 2010

This weekend while I was letting a stranger into my house to sell him a table and wondering if he was going to kidnap me and make a skin coat out of me (spoiler alert: he didn’t and I made $50 bucks!) an important thought came to my mind – stick with me through the [...]

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Would you like to watch a train wreck today? No? How about the next best thing…

August 27, 2010

You may remember Jeana Keough from the original (and hands down absolute best…except for Bethenny) best season of Real Housewives. Duh. She was a Playboy model, then fat, then married to an abusive husband, then skinny, then drunk, then in a relationship with her son, then jealous of her daughter. Or maybe only half of [...]

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If anyone ever invents smell-o-vision, my TV habits will need to change STAT

August 26, 2010

Smell-o-vision? Or recovering from a nose job? The world may never know. I love TV an elephant heart-size amount. If I could invent a perfect day, televison and a Slanket (the rich people version of the Snuggie…what you know about that?) and Spaghetti-Os would be on the agenda. No, I’m not 500 pounds. I was [...]

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If I were a parent…poppin’ pills edition

August 25, 2010

For some reason, this reminds me of sixth grade and pills You may remember in the first installment of this irregular series, that I focused on how I would discipline the child version of myself for throwing rocks at a boy. Let’s be honest with each other – that was some minor league kindergarten BS. [...]

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Eat Pray Poke your eyes out with the sharpest stick you can find and while you’re at it don’t miss your eardrums

August 24, 2010

Imagine me, just like this, in a movie theater I don’t like to go to the movies so you won’t see a lot of movie reviews here – mostly just ones where I make fun of all aspects of the film. The most recent movie I was unfortunate enough to see was Eat Pray Love. [...]

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What to expect when your friend is expecting!

August 20, 2010

Yep. I just did that. I’m not having kids any time soon because I like my giner where it is…and also it would be a miracle. Not the type of miracle like when my sister brought home two “girl” gerbils and one of them had babies a month later. But, a real miracle. But, my [...]

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OINO: Food Truck Race. Cajuns are Everywhere.

August 18, 2010

Thanks, Food Network, for adding yet another TV show to my DVR, which is about to literally explode for being so full. Now I’m going to be a fat loner who can wax poetic about the differences between A&E and Bravo shows. So, the Food Truck Race follows different shady characters of all ethnic backgrounds [...]

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The heavens have aligned and shown me my destiny…

August 17, 2010

Somehow this dude comes up when I put “MILF” into my Google machine…also, lots of other gross stuff comes up, too! One time, I had this really fat friend and his initials were E.A.T. Then, this other time, in college, I had this girl who (as a grandma would say) looked rode hard and put [...]

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