Let’s play a game called “Crazy or not Crazy?” Hint: The answer’s crazy.

I try not to talk about online dating too much because it’s mostly boring and I don’t feel like going through the typical thing when I met someone like “Oh my gosh, are you going to write about me on your blog?” No, I’m not. Because I write about funny things and you are painfully boring and a horrible tipper.

But, one email I just had to share. This one guy asked me out for dinner on a night when I was busy so I suggested lunch – seemed like a nice enough guy on his profile so I thought nothing of it until I opened this gem of an email (my comments in bold, his crazy rant in regular type)

“Hi again, I told ya that I would email ya after I ate something to fill my belly (my eyes are already bleeding from the grammatical errors and gratuitous emoticons)

Anyhioo, darn, you have a date tomorrow evening?? Darn for me – but, what’s nice is that I am special enough to get lunch  hehehhe   And we all know that lunch is the best meal of the day!!   I’m being cute – can’t you tell? (No, I can’t tell because I’ve never head any one say that lunch is the best meal of the day. Not a single person.)

Okay, here’s the deal: I get to hae may little baby girl tomorrow and then having to meet my ex to give her back at 1:00   Now I know she is going to have her boyfriend with her anyhow, so maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing if you were there too. (You’ve never met me and already I’m a pawn in your baby mama drama. Absolutely negatory.) It’s all up to you, trust me, there will be no drama between you two – she was the one who cheated and screwed up in the first place.  Long almost 9 year story, of no money, then a great job, then she got a great job, then we went to lunch / dinner all the time – went to sandals in the bahamas a couple of times, once for 9 days the other for 7 days, anyhow, the economy went south. I was working in the high high end construction industry – my hours wer cut to almost nothing, it wasn’t worth the pay/ drive, and sinking too. I ended up quitting after some more reasons, one of which my boss (Syrian devoted muslum) said to me “your wife is the one having the baby, not you, you need to be here)  enough said.. (I can’t even….)

Anyway, her mother, who also is a money hungry person, convinced her to move on away from me and find a money guy – she did, well now, I am 99.9 % sure I have this new job, I’m going for the 3rd and final interview on monday, but it’s not really an interview. It’s more like a, let’s see if we all like him sort of thing – The boss called me and said that he wants me to meet everyone in the dallas office to see if we are all on the same page that I will be a good fit for the team!!! YAY!!!!  (If your new job involves frequent exclamation points, you’ll be a freaking ace!!!!!!!!)  Besides that, she was banking on the fact that I wouldn’t be able to afford this apartment and she would get it – Wrong… sorry, my family won’t stand for that, so, I am still here, I just purchased another car last weekend, and everything is on the up m up now!!  YAY!!! again…  Can you tell that I am happy?  hehhehe    Only prob is now I am alone, I don’t have a date to get to know anyone right now, so that is why I am on match.   I am not a player, nor do I have that “pick up” style, what I do have is an easy happy go lucky personality.  When it comes to romance, I know how to get serious, and turn it on (Guess what’s not a turn on? Going on and on in an insane fashion about your ex-wife and your lengthy trips to the Bahamas)  – but I need to get to know someone, then I make a move when the time is right. That’s the way it should be anyhow. I also enjoy it if a woman makes the first move too, who doesn’t??

You are most likely wondering where I live: (I AM MOST LIKELY NOT WONDERING THAT!) Random name apartments in a two  bedroom all by my lonesome   More to that long story – that’s the reference I made in my profile of going through the war and back…
If you like you can google earth it – do the street view and you will see what I mean about gorgeous apartments, not only rthat, it’s the community with the lake, walking trails, the canal, the homes, the school, it is the perfect spot!  My building is address of place where bad things probably happen.
I really would like to take you up on that luch offer, 1 ish tomorrow?

I’ll send a pic of my little girl along with some more night shots of my lake area that I took, yes, I was the photo geek in High school, along with a buch of other stuff… We’ll talk about that later, I also want to hear more about you -
Have a good nite if I don’t hear from ya,
Crazy guy
Phone number – please don’t text – I won’t get it, it’s my personal choice – my opinion is that phones were made for talking    I don’t mind ifyou text your friends, but talking is more personal…. (YOU, guy that I’ve never even spoken with, don’t mind if I text my friends? Thanks so much!)”